Stoicism 2 – Week 6: Acting for the common good

Not yet trial-taught Not yet expert-reviewed

This week: practise the discipline of action. Each morning choose one of your roles (child, parent, friend, colleague, neighbour) and one small thing to do for someone in that role. In the evening note what you did and why you did it.

Measurable goal: one small act for someone each day, on at least 5 of 7 days.

1. Traditional teaching

[Traditional teaching] Stoicism teaches that human beings are made to live with and work for one another, so the second discipline is to act rightly within our relationships. Marcus Aurelius was emperor, the most powerful person of his time; in this section he reminds himself not to let power spoil him.

Then he recalls the example of Antoninus Pius, his adoptive father and predecessor as emperor:

Reading it in context

• "Caesar" here is the title of the Roman emperor. Marcus warns himself about how power changes people.
• "A worshipper of the gods" and "a pious disposition" belong to the Roman religion of the time and to the Stoic idea of reason in the universe. This course presents the practice and does not ask learners to accept that view.
• [Traditional teaching] The discipline of action links back to Week 1: Epictetus says the learner is "not free from affects like a statue" but keeps their relationships, as child, parent and citizen.
• [Expert judgement] "Bore with those who blamed him unjustly" is Marcus speaking about criticism in public life. It does not mean putting up with violence or exploitation.

2. What science finds

• [Verified] A meta-analysis of 27 experiments (4,045 people) found that doing kind acts for others raises the doer’s own well-being by a small-to-moderate amount; many of the studies had small samples. (Curry et al. 2018)
• [Inference] Those studies measure how the doer feels. Marcus instead says to do good because it fits human nature, not to feel happier. The two views differ, even when the act is the same.

3. Practice for adults

About 20 minutes a day, plus the time for the small act.

1. Slow reading (3 minutes, morning). Read the second passage. Choose one quality of Antoninus to practise this week: not hurrying; not blaming back when wrongly blamed; letting others speak frankly; being glad when someone shows you something better.
2. Choose a role and an act (2 minutes, morning). Write: "Today, as , I will ." Something small that fits in the day: call your parents, help a colleague with a task, tidy a shared space, let someone go first, thank someone who serves you.
3. Do it, quietly. If you can, do it without telling anyone.
4. Evening journal (10–15 minutes). Note: what you did; while doing it, were you thinking of the other person or of being praised; did this week’s quality of Antoninus get a chance today.
5. Tick it. At the end of the week, count the days with one small act for someone; the goal is at least 5 of 7.

4. Kids' corner 6+

Game: "A good deed for the family" (5–10 minutes, with an adult)

1. Everyone names their "roles": child, brother or sister, grandchild, classmate.
2. The child picks a role and one small thing to do today for someone in it: lining up grandparents’ slippers, pouring water for a parent, lending a toy to a sibling.
3. The adult also picks something and does it at the same time.
4. In the evening ask: "How did you feel doing it? How did the other person feel?"

Small, safe, age-appropriate tasks. Don’t trade good deeds for rewards.

5. Stop practising if

• You feel panic, have flashbacks of trauma, have a lasting sense that you or the world are "not real", lose sleep for several nights, or have thoughts of harming yourself.
• Helping others is wearing you out, or you are already carrying too much caring work. Then choose a small act for yourself instead.
• If so, stop and see Get help now.

6. Foundation skills on daynentang

Ideas for small tasks for children are in children's chores; for adults at work, see Tử tế nơi làm việc (both in Vietnamese).

7. Practice for today

Write "Today, as , I will " and do it before you sleep.

Science sources

• Curry OS, Rowland LA, Van Lissa CJ, Zlotowitz S, McAlaney J, Whitehouse H (2018). Happy to help? A systematic review and meta-analysis of the effects of performing acts of kindness on the well-being of the actor. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 76, 320–329. doi:10.1016/j.jesp.2018.02.014