Stoicism 1 – Week 6: Evening review

Not yet trial-taught Not yet expert-reviewed

This week: read the passage near the end of Seneca’s On Anger slowly, and each evening answer three questions about your day. This is also the week to review the whole course.

Measurable goal: answer the three evening questions on at least 5 of 7 days.

1. Traditional teaching

[Traditional teaching] Stoicism teaches that character is improved day by day, by looking back honestly each day at what we said and did. Seneca learned this habit from the philosopher Sextius and describes how he himself practised it.

Reading it in context

• This passage comes near the end of a book about anger. For Seneca, the evening review is a way of making anger rarer.
• Seneca’s tone is not harsh: he sees a fault, names it, then pardons himself and resolves to do better. [Expert judgement] This is the most important point when practising: reviewing yourself is not scolding yourself.
• Right after this passage, Seneca gives examples of faults he admits to, such as arguing too contentiously or rebuking someone so bluntly that they took offence.

2. What science finds

• We have not found a peer-reviewed review that evaluates a Seneca-style evening review as such.
• [Inference] The exercise may help practitioners notice their habits. But going over one’s faults just before sleep can also make sleep harder for some people. So the exercise is time-limited and ends with a gentle sentence.

Limits: the exercise rests on an ancient text and on practitioners’ experience; there is no direct scientific evidence for it yet.

3. Practice for adults

About 5–10 minutes each evening, at least half an hour before bed.

1. Read (2 minutes). Read the passage slowly.
2. Three questions (5 minutes). Write briefly for each: - What did I do well today, even something small? - Was there a moment I wish I had acted differently? What happened just before it? - What will I try differently tomorrow?
3. Closing sentence (1 minute). Write or say one sentence of pardon in Seneca’s manner: "I let this go this time; tomorrow I will try…" Then close the notebook.
4. Review the course (end of the week, 10 minutes). Read back over six weeks of notes: sorting worries, the kept hour, imagined worries, morning preparation, acts of respect, evening review. Choose one habit you want to keep.

At the end of the week, count the evenings you answered the three questions; the goal is at least 5 of 7.

4. Kids' corner 6+

Game: "Three questions before sleep" (5 minutes, with an adult)

1. At bedtime, the adult asks three questions, answering first so the child has an example: - "What good thing did you do today?" - "Is there anything you would like to do differently?" - "What do you want to try tomorrow?"
2. The adult only listens, does not judge answers as right or wrong, and does not bring up the child’s mistakes from the day.
3. End with a warm sentence, like "Tomorrow we’ll try again."

If the child does not want to talk about what went less well, ask only the first and last questions. daynentang has a family activity, Owning and fixing mistakes (in Vietnamese), that works well with this game.

5. Stop practising if

• You feel panic, have flashbacks of trauma, have a lasting sense that you or the world are "not real", lose sleep for several nights, or have thoughts of harming yourself.
• The review turns into self-blame or self-criticism, or keeps you awake. Then move it to the afternoon, keep only the first and third questions, or pause.
• If so, stop and see Get help now.

6. Foundation skills on daynentang

If the evening exercise makes it harder to sleep, daynentang has a lesson on bedtime habits: Sleep when the mind is unsettled (in Vietnamese).

7. Practice for today

Tonight, before bed, write down one good thing you did today and one thing you want to try tomorrow.